[–] oozeling 0 points 3 points 3 points (+3|-0) ago
Can't wait for @highly_paid_orgy_pro's answer to this.
Mine would presumably be some sort of boring leprosy offshoot.
[–] ProperPropaganda 0 points 8 points 8 points (+8|-0) ago
Great question.
Can't stop watching TV and end up dying on the couch in your own shit stew.
Watch my 600 pound life, I'm already killing people.
[–] TheKFCNyanCat 0 points 7 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago (edited ago)
You'd start shitting colorful, painful diarrhea at a velocity that could potentially kill a man if you pointed it at them. Your taste buds would constantly taste fried chicken. Cats would be particularly adept at detecting this disorder (as they can with cancer,) and will often go out of their way to comfort someone with the disease. You'd die of extremely high blood pressure, as if you'd eaten too much KFC.
[–] sanityunchecked 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
You would go insane and kill yourself driving a BMW 7 series sedan by stressing over the repair costs.
[–] Solstiare 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Incineration via Solar Radiation