0
0

[–] 8_billion_eaters ago 

You would start chewing your fingers like french fries and your toes like mcnuggets. Once you reach your stubbed feet, you would start to plan a meal.....something involving both feet and your ears. Maybe a crockpot thing. Toss in your wallet like a bay leaf.

Nom....Nom...Nom.

0
1

[–] ScreaminMime 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

Obviously your neck and jaw bones would tighten while your larynx froze.

Cause of death asphyxiation.

0
0

[–] Whizwicky ago 

Fuzzy fungus that eats your pecker.

0
0

[–] SelfReferenceParadox ago 

Insanity. Introspection induced insanity.

0
0

[–] TheTrigger ago 

So you'd die from your brain overheating, more-or-less?

0
0

[–] SelfReferenceParadox ago 

Have you read the book Snow Crash?

0
1

[–] sanityunchecked 0 points 1 point (+1|-0) ago 

You would go insane and kill yourself driving a BMW 7 series sedan by stressing over the repair costs.

0
0

[–] HamsAlwaysEatSnacks ago 

You would start feeling the need to add and follow "body positive" movements on social media. Shortly after you would begin to eat constantly, even in bed. You would hoard candy bars in nightstands, office desks, and car glove boxes. Your blood sugar would remain high for so long that not eating sugary foods would cause you to feel irritable and sluggish. Eventually your organs would fail from visceral fat overtaking your systems or you would develop sepsis in one of your multiple open wounds caused by your overstretched skin and you would die. Pretty much the way it happens right now.

0
0

[–] McPhatty ago 

It already was designated as a disease but SJWs are pushing us to beLIEve in #HAES so I still have hope for a cure. Lift your head up high. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4gOheviiKU0

0
0

[–] McPhatty ago 

McPhatty: when you're so fat your #HAES phat (see America)

0
0

[–] poptical-illusionist ago 

Certain patterns on baggy pants that make a girls butt look larger. Most likely to cause an accidental fatality when individuals loose focus on their current activities to get a gander at "the view." Can also result in other non fatal, but serious, injuries.

load more comments ▼ (19 remaining)