[–] Speshul_Sn0wflake 0 points 34 points 34 points (+34|-0) ago
God, that first picture on the right is fucking horrid. It's like Kristen tries to look as ugly, old, and miserable as possible. Imagine my surprise when I found out "Deputy droopy Dog" is actually younger than me. If I put up a side by side comparison of us, you would never guess that I am the older one. I look like a pre-teen compared to that thing.
Now for her quote:
Yeah, my superpower is that I come with a built-in inner tube under my arms, which is really only useful against evil pools and/or water parks, so I mostly prefer the shape and structure a bra gives me.
Translation: "I have a second stomach that rests on top of my fupa, and I like to tell people I have big tits when infact I'm just wide, flat, and flabby. I call waterparks, pools and beaches "evil" because every time I am at one, they send out a crew from NOAA to come scoop me up in a net and bring me back to the ocean. I'm in so much debt from all the rescues they have performed, that I just got a second job at SeaWorld performing twice a day to pay it off."
Hi, we’re Kristin and Sheridan, and we both have generously sized boobies, whoops..
Translation: "Hi, we're two of the ten attention seeking fatties at buzzfeed. We have hardly any tits, but we have plenty of fat folds and lumps that we try to pass off as cleavage. We prefer bras because they push our folds of moldy lard upwards, but we're trying something different because $attenshun. They didn't have any that fit us, so they took the nets they used to rescue us in, and tied ropes to them so we could have makeshift bralettes. Is that a donut? I smell donuts..."
Seriously, look at this thing on the right. Da fuq? What is that? Where does its chin end and where the hell did it's neck go? Why the hell did she think that was a good face to make for the camera? Did it get a whiff of itself? If that isn't a candidate for "The Most Punchable Face Ever" then I don't know what is..
[–] sh1tl0rd_of_ac1d 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago
Seriously, look at this thing on the rightJPG. Da fuq? What is that?
I remember it from Fraggle Rock.
[–] physicscat 0 points 1 point 1 point (+1|-0) ago
Oh dear god...I totally forgot this! Nostalgia!!!!
[–] Speshul_Sn0wflake 0 points 4 points 4 points (+4|-0) ago
OMG I just pee'd a little I laughed so hard. I used to love Fraggle Rock, I don't know how I didn't make the comparison. Brilliant.
[–] Adi-opposed 0 points 7 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago
Stop. Stop I can't take any more. This is fucking gold, all of it.
[–] Speshul_Sn0wflake 0 points 7 points 7 points (+7|-0) ago
Haha thanks! I'm having one of those mornings and this just sent me over the edge... like look at that face! I can't stand her fucking face. Its horrendous. Glad I could make you laugh :)
[–] physicscat ago
Yeah....they kept emphasizing they have big boobs....more like pendulous udders.